Friday, October 27, 2006

Trunk or Treat

Our ward did the trunk or treat party tonight. It was pretty good. The kids are ready to eat all of their candy already. Here are some pictures of the kids.

It's hard trying to get three kids to look at the camera at the same time.

Andi was Sleeping Beauty, again.

Dylan was quite the dashing knight in shining armor.

Peyton borrowed Andi's Eeyore costume. That's right, Eeyore, not a bunny or a dog.

This is a picture from three years ago when Andi was Eeyore for Halloween. Our kids look a bit too much alike.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Driving in Big D

Let me just say that driving in Dallas during the morning and afternoon commute is not something that I would want to do everyday. There are way too many people trying to get to the same place, and it always seems like someone is running into someone else.

I'm guessing some of the driving problems are because driving terms that mean one thing in the part of the country I grew up, mean something totally different here. Like merging. Where I grew up if a sign says merge, I would move into the other lane of traffic because my lane was ending. Here it must mean to speed up and get as far as you can before you slam on your brakes and swerve into the adjacent lane of traffic. That can be confusing, but I'll catch on.

Welcome to crazy town!
This has nothing to do with anything.
I just liked the theme when I was a kid

It seems like weird things happen on these highways too. Like this morning, I was listening to the traffic report, and when I had left the house it said that there was a disabled vehicle that was taking up the right hand lane on I-30. About 40 minutes later, after I had passed the disabled vehicle, the guy on the radio said that now there was a fire truck partially blocking the right hand lane too, because the disabled vehice had caught on fire. Man, I missed it.

If you think it's safer to drive off of the highway and on the streets, think again my friend. I tried that one Monday afternoon, and I'll never do it again. I was trying to find a gas station, and I ended up driving through what I can only describe as the ghetto area of Dallas. Instead of gas stations on every corner, there were liqour stores. I was picturing my story on the news: "An unidentified white male was found on the side of the road, clutching to a map of the Dallas area." It probably wasn't that bad, but it seemed like it. It's not like I'm just a racist or anything. When I was at a stop light by a scary looking white dude with a
"Will Work 4 Food" sign, I locked my doors then too.

I'm glad that I work in Greenville instead of Dallas.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Why Baseball is Boring

Game 3 of the World Series just ended, with the Cardinals winning decisively. As I was watching this game, I realized that baseball is quite a boring sport. Granted it's not as bad as wathcing golf or bowling, but it's usually nothing really exciting. There are great games and great moments in baseball, but how often do they occur? Most baseball games are just a boring waste of three hours that you can't walk away from, just in case something happens.

One thing I noticed while watching the game, is that the ending of a sure victory can be quite tedious. In football and basketball, there is a finite amount of time that the game will last if it is a blowout. But in baseball, who knows. TOnight's game had St. Louis ahead 5 - 0 in the bottom of the ninth. With two outs left and the last batter having two strikes, the fans in the crowd were on their feet and waving their towels awaiting the end of the game. The pitcher winds up, throw the pitch . . . and it's fouled back. Excitement dies down a little until the pitcher winds up again. Again the crowd is cheering, again the batter fouls the pitch. The pitcher again sets up to pitch, the crowd again on its feets, and . . . fouled off. Finally the guy grounded out, but by that time I was trying to figure out who was on Letterman.

Home runs are exciting. Except those may just end up being foul balls too. All home runs are just byproducts of the rampant steroid use anyway, so it's not as cool for some reason.

When people argue for days about whether a player in your sport did or did not have pine tar on his hand instead of talking about the actual game, something may be wrong.

Baseball will never be a real sport until they get rid of the DH in the American League. Make the pitchers try to bat, and make the fat guys who can only hit try to play in the field. It would be more entertaining. Speaking of fat guys . . .

Watching a guy who looks like a High School gym coach from Alabama play a game while he scratches his crotch is not cool.

I'm not saying baseball is bad. It's just that to a casual fan, it can be less than entertaining. Three hours worth of "There's a swing, and it's foul" really isn't worth watching for that one play that everybody talks about the next. You can see on SportsCenter in a nice compacy 3 minute segment. Of course you could probably say the same sort of thing about football, but then you would be mistaken.

You Must Complete the Training

I've been going to a training class in Dallas this week. Most people look at these training classes as a place to learn some new things and gain experience in something. Not me. I look at it as free pop for a week! Woo hoo!

Monday was kind of a bad day because they only had Diet Coke in the machine. Diet Coke? Who drinks that? So on MOnday I drank their free Diet Coke, but I didn't have to like it. And the donuts they have aren't Krispy Kreme donuts. Honestly, how do they expect people to learn if their free donuts aren't Krispy Kreme donuts. I'm appauled.

Tuesday was better because they filled the machine so there was more of a choice than just Diet Coke. I think I drank like 6 cans of pop on Tuesday. I may have a kidney stone coming Wednesday or Thursday. I don't care, I'm drinking their free Coke and Dr. Pepper. Have you ever drank so much pop that the back of your throat feels like it's coated with syrup? No. Yeah, I haven't either.

Wednesday they said that they have pizza for the students. It had better be good free pizza or else I will . . . just eat it anyway.

This just in: baseball is kind of boring. The World Series is on, and it's just not that interesting. But I'm still making my wife watch it, just so she knows who's in charge around here. I mean, I love you honey.

Our kids didn't do anything cute today.

Hey, the 49ers didn't lose this weekend. I think it's because I didn't shave. So, I'm not going to shave for the rest of the football season, then maybe they'll win some more games. They may have also not lost this weekend because they didn't play. Maybe I won't grow a beard, maybe I'll just stop shaving my neck.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Thoughts From Painting a Fence

Saturday afternoon, I found myself outside painting the fence. While I Was painting the fence, I had some time to myself to think of anything I wanted to without being interrupted by screaming children. While some people would use that time to ponder the meaning of life, I've already got that figured out. So, I thought of a lot of not so important things, such as:

I should enter a karate tournament. I would totally win.

I can't believe that Sam hasn't seen The Karate Kid. Seriously, she grew up in the 80's in the United States, and had never seen that movie? What the heck? (Mr. Miagi had Danielson wax on, wax off AND paint the fence and the house and some other stuff.)

I'm not really a fan of songs where the singers end up talking through part of the song. What, were they not able to figure out how to put those words to music? What's the point of the talking during the song?

I saw this Weird Al music video this morning. Donny Osmond is so cool.

I should have been cast in that video.

If I could go back in time, I would totally beat my younger self up. I did a lot of stupid stuff as a teenager, including singing along to the part of songs where the people were just speaking. Man, I was such a dork. Of course the younger me would want to beat me up because I married someone who hasn't seen The Karate Kid and my sons aren't named Joe, Steve, or Jerry. If I could put those differences aside for a minute though, I could totally put down some sweet bets and make a lot of money like Biff from Back to the Future.

How am I going to win a karate tournament when my hand is cramped into a mangled claw from all this painting?

I painted for an hour and made it ten feet? What the heck?

I should grow my hair out like Garth from Wayne's World.

Maybe I should find a hobby that doesn't involve watching TV and movies.


Why am I getting cold. I'm in Texas. It's not supposed to get cold in Texas, right?

I worked on my car when it was 20 degrees below zero back in Wyoming, and I'm complaning about being cold here?

I'm too old to be out in the cold. I'll catch pnemonia. I'm going inside.

When I get to be such a pansy?

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Scoring Points With the Boss Man

One of the team leads in my group sent me this Employee to Employee award this morning. I finished up my first stand alone project yesterday, and he gave me some positive feedback for it. When you get one of these, you're entered into a drawing that could win a $25 gift card. Woo hoo! I wonder if it would work to give myself one . . .

I know this isn't very exciting to anyone else, but it's something that was different in my usual mundane day at "work". (I added the quotes for Sam's amusement since she was teaching Joy School again today.)

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Those who can't do...

TEACH! That's right, today was my first day teaching Joy School, and right off I have a few mysteries I intend to solve. 1) Why do kids only like cheap jellybeans? You give them a Jelly Belly jellybean, and they will spit it out on your driveway. Thanks by the way for that one kid! (just for reference, it wasn't Noah) 2) Why does nobody in the room want a nap, except the adult? I would LOVE a nap, but the people who can take one can't even be bribed into it. And finally 3) Why do the kids seem to multiply when you are at your most frazzled? I had moments where I couldn't even remember how many there were supposed to be, and counting past 3 (my usual number to have at home) was way beyond my capabilities. To sum up, my first day was... interesting, but seemingly successful, and it makes me happy for when this week is over, and I don't have to teach again for a month. Just like I've heard: "Joy School is great... when it's not your week."

Friday, October 13, 2006

He Had It Coming

I got home today from work, and Sam seemed to be a little bit frazzled from her day. This has been a regular occurrence this week, so I was half expecting it. However, I wasn't expecting a certain punishment that Sam ended up giving to the kids.

For some background, it turns out that whenever Dylan got yelled at, or sternly spoken to, or even looked at today he would run into his room, slam the door and start kicking it relentlessly until he decided to come outside and yell at his mother. This happening once or twice may be understandable, but it went on all day. To retaliate, Sam did something that I hadn’t thought of before.

“I took their door.” This took me a bit by surprise. “Took their door?” “Yep, I took their door.” There was no need for further explanation, she took their door. How does one take a door from their child? By unscrewing the hinges from the doorframe and sticking the door in a closet, of course. It took me a minute to process this, but yes, the kids have lost their door until further notice.

I think Sam needs a vacation without the children.

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Male Bonding

Last night we let Andi sleep in our room because she wasn't feeling well. Before dinner she threw up, so we knew she wasn't just making stuff up. She slept on the floor close to the bathroom so she could run in if she needed. I'm glad she's learned to go to the toilet when she's going to do that. It's really helpful.

At about 4:00, Dylan started crying and coming out of his room. He usually does this, so I went through the routine of putting him back in bed. I decided to lay down in bed next to him because I thought he might be lonely without Andi in the room.

When I got in his bed, I noticed that there was a wet spot on his sheet next to his pillow. He took a sippy cup of water to bed, so I figured it spilled some. After laying in his bed for a minute or so, I started picking up a foul odor with my super sniffer. (Actually, it's more of a below average sniffer.) So, I asked Dylan what he brought to his bed to make it smell. I turned on the light, and right where I was laying was a puddle of Dylan's dinner. Well, that's just great.

So here it was 4:00 in the morning, and I stripped Dylan's bed of its sheets. After all the comotion, he didn't want to go back to sleep. Peyton decided to join us at about 4:30. We stayed up and watched cartoons, X-Men 3 (which is a pretty cool show), and Sports Center. It was good fun all around. We decided to get matching tattoos and go hunting next weekend so we can hang a big moose head above the fireplace. However, due to the early morning bonding, all the Carter boys are pretty tired right now.

Next time Dylan wants some manly bonding time with his pop, I hope he just asks for it.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Trend in Picture Taking

I was flipping through the pictures that we have on our computer, and I noticed something (besides the fact that I have a lot of embarrassing pictures of Dylan). When Andi was a young baby, we took quite a few pictures of her. If she had the gas smile, we took a picture, if she was wearing an outfit that she hadn't worn before, we took a picture, if she spit up or pooped, we took a picture. Well, maybe not the last one. But for the first year of her life, Andi had like 4,000 pictures taken of her. I was looking for pictures of Peyton, and guess how many I found. 11. Yeah, there seems to be a slight difference in the number of pictures taken between our first child and third child.

Why is that? I don't know. It's not like I don't have the same camera as I did when Andi was a baby. It's not like we don't love Peyton as much. I think it's because the novelty of having a new baby kind of got worn off. It's hard to notice every little change in a kid when you have a 3 year old singing "Yellow Submarine" to you. Our kids all look the same anyway, so we could pass a baby picture of Andi off as Peyton if we needed to.

So, I think I'll set a goal to take more pictures of Peyton. Will I acheive it? Well, let's just say that my New Years Resolution was to lose weight. I would start working on the picture goal right now, but the kid is asleep, and I don't think his mother would be too happy if I woke him up.

Here's Peyton playing with a blue cup.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

My Pretty Girls

I'm so disappointed.

Andi was playing dress up Saturday morning. I guess she decided that Dylan would be a pretty princess. I would have been quicker to get him out of the dress, but I decided to take a picture of it to have for blackmail later on. Hehehe.