Thursday, January 01, 2009

New Year's Resolutions

I wasn't going to make a list of resolutions this year. Why wait until New Year's Day to resolve to do something you could do any time of the year? But then I decided that it's a tradition like fireworks on the fourth of July, pumpkin pie on Thanksgiving, or receiving an atomic wedgie on the first day of school. (Glad that's over with, though it still happens at work and at home from time to time.) So, here goes my list of things I should do this year.

Lose Weight This is another tradition, the old lose weight resolution. This is the ninth year in a row for this one. You have to admire that consistency. I can pin down three main reasons why this never ends up happening.
I like food. I don't want to start eating rice cakes and oatmeal. Besides, I made oatmeal for my kids once and they said it was disgusting, so I'm going to take their word for it.
2. I like Mountain Dew and Coke when Mountain Dew is not available. I've tried the diet versions of the two, and they just aren't as good. The Diet ones just taste like they left the sugar out or something, and sugar makes stuff taste good. Unless it's my oatmeal, then apparently no amount of sugar can mask the nastiness and taste bud burning putridity.
3. To lose weight I would probably need to exercise, and exercise makes me tired. I don't really like being tired. I haven't slept in like six years, so I'm always tired already. If I exercised I would probably be falling asleep at work starting at 10:00 in the morning, where as right now I'm making it until 1:30 before I start snoozing. I did pretty good at exercising back in May when we first got the Wii Fit, but at the end of June the TV we had in our room went out, and after that I just figured, eh.
So, there you go. I really should lose weight (that sounds familiar) due to stuff like being tired all the time and something called "blood pressure" and it being "too high". This year it will happen! Yeah, that's it.

Write more stuff on the blog Well, that is like a kiss of death to the blog right there. Sorry blog, I'll miss you. I want to do this more so that I can remember what happened during the year. I was going to do one of those lame "year in review" posts, but I realized I wrote like 2 things a month so my review would have ended up saying "Gas prices sucked then were awesome, and I like Mountain Dew." If I keep it up enough, the kids could have some good documentation if they ever end up needing therapy.

Finish things I start I have a short attention span due to my lack of sleep for the past six years, so I'll think something is a good idea and get started on it and then lose interest half way through. Hmmm, that could explain my failure in the weight loss and blogging departments . . .

Well, that's all I have. Now that I've written down my goals, I am certain that I will achieve them. Oh hey, Imagination Movers is on, gotta go!