Walker, Texas Ranger

Just so you know, Peyton is walking now. I don't have any video or pictures of it because he's out third kid, and it's kind of lost its coolness. Instead of being happy, it's more of a "Great, another one that can run up and hit me in the crotch with his head." If I ever do get video or a picture of it, I'll stick it up here because it kind of looks funny. He just had a doctor appointment, and his head is measuring in the 80th percentile and his height and weight in the 25th and 8th, so he kind of looks like a Peanuts character with his big head and tiny body.

Maybe I should end this with a positive affirmation for my boy. Hey Peyton, if you ever read this, remember that you can do anything that you put your mind to. Why? Because you're good enough, you're smart enough, and dog gone it, people like you.

Pictures

Ok, so I lied about not taking any pictures when we were gone. I did take a few pictures at the Salt Lake Temple while we were waiting the hour and a half for the bride and groom to come out. There aren't may, but here you go.

Hangin' out in the shade

Knock knock

Unfairly Typecast

On May 19th, Sam's brother Barton got married in the Salt Lake Temple. He is the last sibling of ours to get married, so from now on my summer vacation time can start going to vacations instead of weddings. Woo hoo! The wedding and festivities were all good. We took our camera, our camcorder, and Andi's camera, but we didn't take a single picture. Some people did, and if I ever get a hold of a good one I may stick it up here.

Since we flew down (thanks to Sam's Dad), we had to rent a car while we were there. I thought "hey cool, it'll be a little break from the silver minivan." How wrong I was. We ended up getting a mini van. And it was silver. And it had Texas plates on it. It's like we hadn't even left home. The guy at the counter didn't even ask me if I wanted to upgrade to a convertible. He just said "So, you're getting the minivan." I filled out my paperwork, and he told me to haul myself, my luggage, and my thirty children up the escalator to the place where the shuttle would pick us up and take us to our glorious silver minivan. Hoorah.

It's sad to me that I can't even go on vacation and get away from a silver minivan. I'm not gonna drive one of those for the rest of my life. I hope.

The nice gentleman who didn't offer me a convertible did offer the loss damage waiver for $12.99 a day. I thought, "Nah, what could happen?" Well, we got a rock chip in the windshield of the Speed Racer. D'oh! I guess karma or whatever thought I would feel more at home with a rock chip in my rented car to match the one I have at home. Fixing the rock chip only cost $25, so it cost less than the loss damage waiver. Take that, rental car company! I win again! Ha! Wait, you charge how much to rent a silver minivan for five days? Oh come on, that's not fair.

Ladies Man

Yesterday Sam went to get her hair cut, so that left me with watching the kids. The mall we went to has a little play area for kids. One of the toys in the play area that a little convertable car the kids could sit in. Andi and Dylan got a chance to sit in the car at one point. They didn't do much but sit in it. Andi left after a while, and Dylan slid over to the driver's seat. Not too long after Andi left, two girls climbed in the car next to Dylan, and they sat in the car with him for a while. I couldn't hear what he was saying to them, but I'm sure that it was along the lines of "Hey baby, you come here often."

We left the play area, and Sam was still getting her hair cut, so I took the kids to lunch at McDonald's. I let them play in the Play Place because they don't get to do it often and we had time to kill since apparently Sam had a lot of hair. Andi was too afraid to climb up into the fun area of the Play Place, so Dylan ventured up there by himself. I would see him running past on a bridge every now and then, and he would sometimes stop to say "Hi" and wave. That is, until some girls joined him in the Play Place. After that, he was running around and playing with four or five girls. I think I heard him say something like "Your eyes are as pretty and blue as my Superman pajamas" to one of them.

Sometimes I worry about Dylan and his social skills (since somedays the only things he says to his mother are "No" and "Mommy, I pooped!"), but after yesterday I think he's going to be ok.

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all moms out there. I'm sure youre kids are thankful that you didn't kill them when they were two. Or four. Here's a video clip that somebody sent to me last year.

Friend to All Animals

Today I had to walk from the building I usually work in to a warehouse on the other side of the plant. On the way there, I passed by a bush that a bird was perched on. I thought it was kind of weird that the bird kind of just stared me down and didn't move. After I had passed it a few steps, I felt something hit my shoulder like someone had thrown something at me. That happened all the time in high school, so it's nothing new to me. I turned around to look and didn't see anything. I kept walking, and I felt it again. I turned around again and saw the bird from the bush flying above me and flapping its wings menacingly. I didn't really feel like fighting a bird, so I kept walking. After I turned my back, the bird hit me again. I would have asked the bird what I did to it to make it so mad, but it's a bird and I probably wouldn't have gotten very far with it.

Between that and the numerous splats of bird droppings on the sidewalk, I'm getting a little paranoid of birds.

The peaceful sounds of summer?

For the last few weeks we have had some of the most beautiful weather here in Texas. That is, with the exception of the Tornado warnings we had a week and a half ago, but for the most part, it has been really nice. So much so, that we have been trying to avoid turning on the AC by leaving our windows open, using our ceiling fans, etc. anything that will help the nice breeze circulate through the house. Last night,for some reason, Andi had a terrible time falling asleep. First, she came to our room asking for "water with cold ice" (as opposed to water with warm ice?) Cameron got it for both kids, and carried them back to bed. Next, Andi came down telling us that she could hear a chicken "bawking" out her bedroom window. She seemed pretty freaked out, so Cameron took her back to bed, and realized that she had been talking about the crickets outside. He asked if she wanted him to shut their window, but she wanted it open. Probably a half an hour later, Andi was back downstairs saying that she could hear the blinds hitting Sadie's kennel in the kitchen. Again, Cameron took her to bed (yeah, I don't do the up and down thing as well as he does, so he does most of the footwork at night.) and asked if he should shut her window. Again, she said no, and we thought that would be the end of it. By this time, Dylan had woken up from the chaos Andi had caused, so it was his turn to come downstairs. He was just crying, and as Cameron was on his way up the stairs yet again, to take Dylan to bed this time, I could hear Andi yell something. I couldn't make it out, but she sounded really irritated. When Cameron made it to their room, I guess he found a scene something like this: Andi curled into a ball in the corner of her bed, yelling "I can't take it! It's bugging me!" Turns out that the peaceful sound of the crickets chirping was making her nuts, and making it nearly impossible for her to fall asleep. Needless to say, Cameron closed their bedroom window, and we didn't hear a peep the rest of the night. I guess we're not raising a future camper!

Birthday Party

We had a quasi birthday party for Peyton yesterday. We had the Crookstons over for dinner and then opened presents and had cake and stuff. Here are some pictures from the festivities.

He didn't really do much of the opening by himself.

Cool Sesame Street thing.

This piggy bank was a hit with all the kids. Thanks, guys!

Ok, what do I do with this?

Oh, I get it.

Mmmm, cake.

Must have sugar.

Yeah, he ended up getting a little bit messy.

You only turn one once, might as well enjoy it.

Birthday Boy

Yesterday was Peyton's first birthday. Man, time flies. Sometimes. Here's a video clip of him playing last night, if you're interested.

The Dog House Paradigm

I remember from classes and motivational assemblies in high school people telling me that if I picture something in my head and visualize what I want to have happen I would have a better chance of succeeding, or something like that. I have tried to do that in life, because it makes sense. If you're going to do something, it's good to have a plan and to be able to picture what it is you'll be doing. Of course you're not going to picture yourself failing, so you kind of get that image of acheiving your goal in your head. You can picture the pending success, and it is good.

However, there are several times when things don't go quite as well as you had pictured in your head. In my case, that happens more often than not.

Take for instance our dog house. You see, we got a dog back in February. I decided that we needed a dog house. I looked at the price of manufactured dog houses, and then looked up some directions on how to build a dog house to see what the difference would be. Building a dog house would only cost $20, versus like $95 from what I saw for a manufactured dog house. Being the cheapskate that I am, I decided to go ahead and build a dog house. What could go wrong? The directions I found at Lowes.com were simple enough, and the picture of the dog house looked fine. I gave it a shot. I had pictured in my head a pretty nice looking dog house that she would be able to use for a while.

As soon as I cut the first piece out, I knew I was in trouble. Not because I didn't cut it straight or anything, but because the piece looked awfully small for our golden retriever. It looked big enough for a chihuahua, though. I didn't stop, I kept going because I wanted to see how the end result would look, because in my head, it looked great. I finished the dog house, and well, it stands. It does have some structural integrity to it. It does not look good, though. Sadie is already too big for it. I didn't get the right nails, so where there are nails in the roof, there are streaks of, rust, I don't know. And it's not exactly leak proof, either. So instead of this fine piece of architecture that I had pictured, we ended up with a few slivers and a tetanus shot waiting to happen.

I wish I could saw that my capentry skills were the only area of my life affected by "The Dog House Paradigm". (That sounded better in my head.) I have been crippled by this my whole life.

In high school, trying to pick up women: I always had the perfect line in my head waiting for the right moment to move in and swoop a girl off her feet. When I finally decided to move in, I tripped over my own feet and then mumbled something inaudiable before cowering away dateless and dorky.

The one time in my life I've been to a dance club:
A friend of mine made me do it. I had the image in my head of me dancing with a girl or two and looking cool. I think I have blacked out most of that night, because I can't remember what happened. It couldn't have been good. I haven't been to a club ever again.

Trying to flirt with my wife:
I say something stupid and end up having to wash the dished to make up for it.

Taking a physics test:
I had the formula in my head and knew what I was doing, until I got my graded test back with a notefrom the teacher that said "How did you even get that answer?"

At work:
All the stuff I work works great the first time. Then somebody else looks at what I did and break it. Grrrrr.

This post:
I'm not 100% sure if paradigm fits what I'm getting at.

My children:
They're perfect angels, then I wake up with one of them in the bed next to me and my shoulder hurting because I wasn't able to roll over all night.

Life is cruel, but I guess whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.